Ah, modern dating. It’s an amalgamation of cheesy apps and awkward dating lines: the pinnacle of human contact. It’s a shame to see how the proportionality of increased technological advancements to decreased human interaction. If you think all is well in the dating world, don’t worry, we’ll change your mind.
It’s so hard to hold a conversation with someone without a tweet, beep, or ring interrupting the full thing. We’re addicted to the things. We’ve trained ourselves to release dopamine whenever we’ve been awarded a tiny tidbit of information, like a new text or Snapchat. It really breaks down the face-to-face quality.
Looks Can Be Deceiving
Most people go on Tinder and Bumble dates because they matched with someone who they think is “insanely hot,” just to get disappointed when they meet up in person. This is because we’ve come to value looks over almost everything else. Intellect, achievements, and personality are secondary thoughts. This could not be any more ass-backwards. People are more than just a face and a body. get that through your heads, society!
The Chameleon Effect
When we’re meeting new people, we tend to try to create this “best version of ourselves,” that may stray a little too far from who we really are. There’s a reason people give the advice to just be yourself. How far a lie can accidentally go, just to impress someone who likes you for you, can prove to be unhealthy later on in the relationship.
The Dreaded End Of The Honeymoon
Some people are in love with finding love. They don’t want anything real, they just want to be in that spark of a new relationship…forever. With instant gratification taking over the world, there is much more infidelity because people seek the thrill of the unknown. And when you’re with someone for over a year or two, they become very well known.
No Pain, No Gain
People are hurt quite easily these days, and the worst part is it’s mostly self-inflicted. When you don’t know what someone is thinking, or unsure of how something played out, you jump to conclusions like a mother-loving pole vaulter. Don’t get caught up in what-ifs, because they will eat away your mental health, slowly.
We Lose Our Individuality
There’s a lot of pressure to have a significant other, which is only increased by the relative deprivation of our colleagues getting married and moving into houses at 25. How the hell they do it is beyond me. But nowadays people just latch on to anyone who moves and completely delve into the relationship, losing their own individuality, thoughts, and setting themselves up to be broken if and when a breakup occurs.
Jedi Mind Games
People in relationships can start to become jealous or doubtful of their partner, and instead of asking them about it straight up, what do we do? We play games, and set them up to fall into traps to learn the truth. It’s literally the opposite of building trust and love in a relationship. Looking into a s/o’s texts, trying to get their passwords instead of asking where they are is just straight up unhealthy.
Peanut Butter & Jealous
Instant gratification has reared it’s ugly head here the worst. We’ve started cheating more, because it’s convenient and easier than being faithful. We stop trying to fix problems, because that’s harder than breaking up. AS a result, more people get divorced. Less people choose to get married. Homes become split. It’s rending the current generation, and it looks like it’s only going downhill from here.
We’re Not After Love
Some people truly want to fall in love and spend eternity with someone. A lot of people who date now just want basically anyone who will willingly have sex with them and watch TV. They’re not after love, they’re after someone who they can hang out with. It’s a relationship founded on the wrong pillars of reason.
It’s not completely dead, but it is lacking. There’s nary a guy in his 20s who has ever put his coat in a puddle (Although it’s a fair argument that women don’t need a man to do that for them anymore). But sometimes the offer and gesture is more sweet than the thing itself. Holding doors is easy, pulling out chairs is easy. But these things and more are started to deplete. And don’t think women don’t notice. They do. Especially when they see someone else do.