Texting has become one of the most common forms of communication. Older generations like to complain about millennials being obsessed with their phones, but they’re just as guilty. Texting is the easiest way to speak sometimes, and most people prefer it over phone calls. It helps shy people be vocal, it keeps your conversation private, and you could dress each text with an Emoji from Apple’s arsenal.
When texting though, the conversation may go slightly different than how it would if you were speaking face-to-face. Texting gives people more confidence to speak their mind. You may speak to friends and your S.O. differently if you’re texting them, but that isn’t always the best way of going about communicating. Especially if there is a serious issue that has to be addressed.
Here is a short list on why to avoid texting when speaking about serious matters with a S.O.
It’s hard to pick up on their tone
Punctuation is not always sufficient in relaying your emotions in a text message. An exclamation point could come off as aggressive, or even questionable, and it could cause large issues. Sometimes, misinterpreting their tone makes it easier to misunderstand what they are saying, and a problem could arise when there isn’t one to start with. Relaying the incorrect tone is crucial when speaking about something serious because it leads one to interpret on their own, and it might make things worse.
Miss out on body language
Body language is super important in any conversation. Sometimes, certain body motions say more than verbal cues, and their message will come across clearly. If someone has to rely on words to express their emotion, their feelings might be slightly invalidated because their bodies are not involved. You can’t see their facial expressions or see them crossing their arms, so messages that are meant to be serious might not pack such a strong punch.
It could take to long to receive a response
What is more stress-inducing than waiting for a text response after sending a risky text? When having a serious conversation, it can be frustrating to wait for a text back because you need to know what they’re feeling so you can understand the situation better. If you send a text, and then wait for their reply, it gives you a lot of time to harp on what you said, or assume their response. This might put you in a negative mindset because you are expecting the worse, and its bad to feel negative when speaking of something serious.
It’s easy to avoid the real issues
Texting makes it easier to gloss over what is being said and focus on another part of the message. This causes miscommunication and that will not make for a successful conversation about something serious. Also, it’s very easy to ignore a text message for a bit, and that could be very bad. If you’re talking face-to-face about something serious, you can’t just stop answering or walk away without an issue. But by texting, either one of you could ignore the text or take your time to respond. Bad news bears.
It could create a strain on the relationship
If you have text conversations about serious issues, it might turn into a preference. After experiencing serious texting conversations, one of you might choose to have every serious conversation through text message. Because it’s easy to hide behind the phone and avoid confrontation, texting might seem better for some situations. However, having texting too often about serious things will take away from when you have a serious conversation in person. You might find that you don’t recognize your S.O. because their argument style is different. Having a serious conversation in person is the best thing for the relationship.