There comes a time in every sort of fling (there’s a lot of definitions to this term) where you have to take a step back and wonder what direction it will go in. Is there a possibility of a relationship starting up? Or is it strictly something else? The most important aspect of this is communication with your potential partner, I can’t stress this enough. But if you’ve gotten this far, I’ll assume that you are considering a potential relationship rather than just a temporary fling. Note that as you progress towards a serious relationship, there are several aspects of your relationship that may change. Consider them before you do anything drastic.
How you’re going to go about bringing it up to them
The first step here is how exactly you want to go about pursuing the relationship. I assume that if you’ve been thinking about this before, then your feeling may be reciprocated. But if it isn’t don’t bring it up out of the blue. Gradually make your way towards relationship talk, and if your fling is interested in it, then yay! But if not, you may have to work on it a bit, if they have some interest.
Don’t let this be a spur of the moment decision
Don’t let this be something that you randomly decide to do one day. Seriously consider the idea of having a serious relationship with this person before you actually do anything. If you see no objection to it, and truly feel in your heart that this is what you want, then go for it. But if you don’t at first, don’t give up! You might just need some time to know your feelings for this person, and chances are, they may need to as well.
Would things change drastically in a relationship?
If the two of you were to seriously attempt a relationship, how much would change? If the answer is “not much,” then the two of you are perfect together. But if the answer is “a lot,” then you may need some time to advance your relationship to the state where you know that the two of you will make it as a couple.
You or your partner will have to end things with anyone else you’re seeing
If you just have a non-committed fling, chances are either you or them may be seeing other people as well. Unless you’re in some weird polygamous relationship, you’re going to have to end everything romantic with anyone else that isn’t your partner. Show your partner that you’re invested in them and only them, and they’ll look at you in a different light. You can only hope that they’ll reciprocate as well.
Make sure it’s not just about hooking up
A lot of flings are based on the whole friends with benefits idea, and some people tend to catch feelings as a result of it. If you’re in this situation, you have to distinguish where your feelings are at. Do you love this person because you know you can hook up with them? Or is it because you have actual feelings for them? If you want to proceed with a relationship, make sure you’re in love with them as a person. Not for the momentary pleasure that they can provide.
They’re going to meet your family and friends at some point
If the two of you proceed with a relationship, then congratulations! The sad, yet inevitable truth is, you’re going to have to meet and be friends with your partner’s friends and family. The same goes for them in regards to your friends and family as well. You have to consider this fact: would your friends or family like your partner? If yes, great. If not, show off your partner in the brightest light possible, and hopefully everyone will be able to see what you see.
Do you see a future together with them?
You have to think long-term when you approach a potential relationship. If you don’t see a future, then you more than likely have an answer. But if you think you see something in your partner, it may take a serious relationship for them to show their serious side as well. This goes along a bit with the “spur of the moment” idea that I brought up before. You need to think out all possible aspects of a potential relationship, including what the future between the two of you consists of. That includes what each of you want, as well as whether or not the two of you have your shit together.