Summer flings. Almost all of us have had them. I don’t know if it’s the hot weather or if there is something in the water during the summer but no one likes to be tied down when the weather starts to warm up. We all like to be kept warm during those winter months, but when the summer hits it’s time to be free.
There’s a fine line between being in a relationship and having a summer fling and let’s be honest … most of us have crossed it. No one wants to be that girl crying over the hot Italian dude you met during your summer in Italy, the one with the really nice body, who barely spoke English, yes that guy.
So what should you do when you feel yourself becoming that stage- five clinger? Here are 8 ways to actually having that hot, no attachment, summer fling that you’ve always wanted.
Don’t get too involved in their personal life
You aren’t there to wipe their tears when they didn’t get that job they really wanted. Sure, you don’t have to be a shitty person but there is a difference between being there for them and feeling COMPLIED to be there for them. Their feelings aren’t your responsibility. On the other hand, you can’t go to them for all of your problems either, it’s easy to fall into a routine with someone that you care all your intimate details with.
Don’t add each other on social media
This just shouldn’t happen. Trust me. When you have a fling with someone it’s human nature to want to check up on them when you aren’t with them, or maybe I’m just a stalker, but either way, they have a life outside of you. Maybe you aren’t the only one they are seeing, maybe they’re flirting with millions of other girls, maybe you fall in love with them because of all the pictures he posts with babies and dogs, either way just don’t do it.
Don’t stalk their ex
Like the previous one, their life outside of you shouldn’t be that important. You checking up on his baby mama isn’t going to change that fact that you will never have a baby with this guy, he’s a fling leave it at that. Checking up on his ex will only have you thinking what did she have that he wanted to be with her? Also don’t creep on his friends or family, they aren’t important.
Have more than one
What’s better than one? Two. Sometimes the best way to not fall in love with someone is to focus your time between two people. If you are spending morning to night with the same person and that becomes your go- to, guess what? You’re going to catch feelings fast.
Put things in perspective for yourself
You aren’t going to have this happily ever after with this guy if you just see him as a fling. Sit down and actually visualize your future, do you see them in it? You shouldn’t, they’re a booty call, treat them as one, but like respect, obviously.
Don’t treat them like your partner
They’re not your significant other, so don’t treat them as one. Maybe they like to plan cute dates for you, that’s cute and all but can get way too messy. Keep things short and simple, spend time together but don’t plan this elaborate $100 romantic carriage ride that drops you off to this fancy restaurant. Way too much work for a fling, don’t put too many feelings into it.
Be open and honest
If you both sit down and have an honest discussion, it’s a lot easier to avoid that awkwardness of the what are we? You’re having sex. That’s it. If you both aren’t on the same page, then it’s probably best to go your separate ways. There are plenty of people out there, you don’t know this one.
Set a deadline
If you feel yourself falling for this person but you have great sex, set a deadline. Sometimes they’re set for you (Going back to America after the summer is over with the hot foreign guy) but sometimes you have to be mature and set them yourself. Yeah it’s great for now but for how long will it be? Are you going to get increasingly attached? End it.