When you’re dating someone new whom you’re really interested in, sometimes you might feel some urges, sexual urges. And they’re completely natural.
But I’m not going to do a whole high school lecture about ‘the birds and the bees’. Ok? Im here to tell you why you shouldn’t act on those impulses, at least not yet.
Here are 9 reasons as to why it’s a good idea to wait to have sex, when dating someone new.
You don’t want to give them the wrong impression
Sometimes having sex too soon, can sometimes cause mixed signals that might communicate that you’re mostly interested in hooking up. Or that your are more interested in sex, than the ‘getting to know each other’ aspect of dating.
There’s no build up to the special moment
When you hold off on sex, while dating someone there’s a build up of sexual tension due to the fact that both people are imagining what it’s like to touch or see the other person without their clothes on. That build up, tends to increase the attraction and desire between the two people.
You’re letting them in to easily
You two have just started dating. Do you think they deserve to see you bare, and explore your body? Your body is something you should treasure, at the end of the day though your decisions and actions are up to you. But give yourself some more credit. Do they deserve to see the booty that you do 200 squats a day to maintain? Or those cup size B boobs that look good with or without a bra?
Might put an end to you two dating
Sometimes having sex too soon can ruin the mystery between the two of you. The mystery being “I wonder what sex with them is like?”. Because now that the questions has been answered, now what? Now that you’ve achieved a major milestone, what else do you two have to work your way towards?
They might lose interest
Some people lose interests after having sex with someone a couple of times or even once. Thats why its good to take it slow and let them get to know you better so that after you two finally do it, they won’t make their decision to stay or leave just based on the sex. Because honestly your sex game might be wack, but you might have an amazing enough personality that keeps them around.
There’s no need to rush
Slow it down, there’s no rush. I understand the way they talk about existentialism, and take their coffee black might turn you on. But there’s no rush. If they like you they’ll stay. And as time goes on you will have a chance to have sex, but theres no need to do it the same week you met them.
Get to know them better (especially their medical history)
This is someone you’re DATING. I repeat DATING. This is not someone who you plan to just hook up with, or a have a one nightstand with. This is someone who is genuinely interested in you, and who you are interested in as well. The fact that you two are dating, and not going to each others house on the first day you meet means that you two have some feelings for one another. So try your best to preserve those feelings, by not fucking up and giving up to your impulses too soon. Try to get to know them, not get in them. Also you are not invincible, it’s very easy to catch an STD. Take the time to get to know their medical history, and maybe take a trip to the clinic so you both can get tested.
Become comfortable being around them with your clothes on first
Get more comfortable just being in their presence, to the point where you don’t find yourself getting nervous before you meet them, and you’re not embarrassed to sing your favorite songs around them. That comfort can later transfer to the bedroom, when you two become more intimate.
It could affect your feelings towards one another
Having sex too soon can affect your feelings towards one another. It might make one of you, or both of you, lose interests. It can cause strong feelings to manifest, but also those feelings might not be romantic feelings, but more along the lines of lust, and infatuation.