V-Day is fast approaching people. Maybe you’re in a rock-solid relationship, or maybe you’ve already reserved your table for 1 at Outback Steakhouse for the big night. If you’re alone, don’t worry, you’re not alone in your alone-ness. But if you’re in a relationship, now is the perfect time to evaluate how things are.
Millennials have been critiqued endlessly about destroying the modern day relationship and dinner date. But if you’re looking for signs of a healthy relationship, check out these millennial do’s and don’ts.
You Can Be Silent Together
Most people see silence between two significant others as a sign there’s nothing left to talk about. However, this isn’t always true. If you’re comfortable enough with your partner to undergo bouts of quiet introspective thinking, and not get worried, then that’s good. We’re very busy in this day and age, so it’s good to take a break and check-out mentally for awhile, and for your partner to accept this.
You Support Each Other’s Work
It’s important to be supportive of your S/O, especially in their career. It’s not easy to balance friends, family, a relationship, and work. But if you find your partner asking you to blow off work for them or constantly complaining about it to you, that’s a red flag. If your work is what you love and makes you happy, then they should be respecting that.
How You Fight Speaks Volumes
Every relationship is going to have some rocky waters, that’s just human nature. But if there’s a lot of screaming and cursing, that can be toxic. Being dismissive of claims and feelings, talking condescending, or showing sincere hatred aren’t healthy. A fair fight is listening and arguing different points, without trying to ‘beat’ your partner.
What is trust? Knowing your S/O’s phone password, but not looking into it. If you truly love them, you’ll respect their privacy. It’s okay to voice concerns or thoughts, but try not to be a negative Nancy. The mind is often the biggest enemy to relationships, playing out what-ifs and unlikely scenarios. Trust your partner, unless you have a considerable reason not to, then assume everything’s good.
We’ve all had the S/O who takes forever to text back, but then screams at us if we take more than 3 seconds to respond. This can feel very invasive, and shows signs of weakness in the relationship. If you can’t stand the thought of what your partner Is doing instead of texting you back, you need to rethink the above tip.
There’s Mutual Respect
Maybe you hate your partners friends, or even his family. You don’t have to get along with everyone. But if you can’t play nice around them, or even respect your partners taste, then you’re just hurting their feelings and doubting their choice. This might not seem like a big deal, but it can make fights even worse down the road.
Don’t Worry About Social Media
If you’re the type of guy or girl who’s constantly monitoring your better halves’ Instagram and Facebook, you need to quit that shit, pronto. You can’t control every aspect of a relationship and controlling what they choose to post out of free will is incredibly restricting. You can tell them how you feel about things, but you shouldn’t try to silence or change their decisions.
There’s something that happens in real conversations that can’t be conveyed in texts, phone calls, or even face time. Just being present in the moment, having a real conversation, not looking at your phone every few moments. Being in the moment is started to receive wider praise from our generation, and it’s a good way to feel more connected to your partner, and reconnect after a long day or some time apart.
Whether it be in the bedroom or talking about a subject, there’s some things that are bound to be uncomfortable for your partner. Instead of pressing them, you need to respect the space they desire and their preferences. You might think you’re doing what’s best to help them, but they can’t be helped if they don’t want the help. Acknowledge this, no matter how frustrating it may be. You need to let them do them.