Living with Regrets: 18 Things Everyone Should Regret

regret

Ugh where do I start. How much time do you have. Does every moment of every day count?

Below are my regrets… and counting.

1. All those hours spent watching Vanderpump Rules

2. Eating kale that one time

3. 95% of the guys I’ve been involved with

4. RSVPing to any event, ever

5. The one time I over-plucked my eyebrows

I was so young and naive. And browless for a month.

6. All the overnight camps I was forced to go to went to as a kid

FUCK sleepaway camp. I want my mommy.

7. Agreeing to be set up

#howdoIlose20lbsin2days #ughbutIdon’twanttowearrealpants #thisiswhyIdon’tdate

8. Not buying more Girl Scout Cookies

I could’ve frozen them!! Why didn’t you think ahead, Alex?!

9. That I live in a society with Donald Trump supporters

Some Facebook comments on Trump’s proposal to ban Muslims from entering the U.S.

10. 99% of the times I shave my legs

#whatawaste

There always turns out to be no reason for it anyway.

11. Buying so many candles

Like, I just could never burn as many candles as I own. Is there a charity that needs candles?

12. That Barbie exists.

WHAT. THE FUCK.

And is marketed towards young girls.

13. Ever giving a shit

Like, there’s just no point.

14. Did I mention the guys I’ve dated?

15. That one time I let one of said guys convince me that ‘spiritual enlightenment’ by way of pot cookies was a sufficient/acceptable/not completely fucking stupid birthday present to me

#24hoursofhell #paranoiaonfleek

16. That I never got a perm

I don’t know, I just feel like I missed out, you know?

17. That the Kardashians haven’t died collectively in a private family plane crash

“Saint”? Really?

18. That I didn’t embrace coffee sooner

#GilmoreGirlsgetsme

I mean, where was I all these years?

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Alex is an attempted humor writer who lives in LA but kind of hates it there. She kind of hates everything, but finds salvation (not the religious kind) in humor. She is sarcastic, offensive, and crude, but also volunteers with children and puppies on the weekends so isn't completely the worst. You can find more of her writing at onlybadchi.wordpress.com.

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