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Quotes from Rejected Jurors on the Martin Shkreli Trial are HILARIOUS

We all know everyone hates this asshole.

If you need a reminder, Martin Shkreli raised the price of a lifesaving cancer drug by an insane amount of money, making it impossible for people who actually need it to be able to afford it.

Shkreli was then arrested for a bunch of shit because that’s what he deserves.

Though Martin Shkreli was found guilty and awaits sentencing after being convicted of conspiracy and securities fraud in a 3-day trial, it doesn’t mean the trial is over.

Thanks to Harper’s Magazine, a transcript of the 3-day jury has been published which included excerpts from the prospective jurors who were rejected before the trial began.

LOL. You need to see this.

First up:

Juror No. 1: I’m aware of the defendant and I hate him.
Benjamin Brafman: I’m sorry.
Juror No. 1: I think he’s a greedy little man.
The Court: Jurors are obligated to decide the case based only on the evidence. Do you agree?
Juror No. 1: I don’t know if I could. I wouldn’t want me on this jury.
The Court: Juror Number 1 is excused. Juror Number 18.


Juror No. 52: When I walked in here today I looked at him, and in my head, that’s a snake — not knowing who he was. I just walked in and looked right at him and that’s a snake.

And then:

Juror No. 70: I have total disdain for the man. When you go back to how he was able to put so many children —
The Court: You have negative feelings?
Juror No. 70: Very.

Then this:

Juror No. 59: Your Honor, totally he is guilty and in no way can I let him slide out of anything because —
The Court: Okay. Is that your attitude toward anyone charged with a crime who has not been proven guilty?
Juror No. 59: It’s my attitude toward his entire demeanor, what he has done to people.
The Court: All right. We are going to excuse you, sir.
Juror No. 59: And he disrespected the Wu-Tang Clan.

And my personal favorite:

Juror No. 144: I don’t think I can because he kind of looks like a dick.

Juror No. 28: I don’t like this person at all. I just can’t understand why he would be so stupid as to take an antibiotic which H.I.V. people need and jack it up five thousand percent. I would honestly, like, seriously like to go over there —
The Court: Sir, thank you.
Juror No. 28: Is he stupid or greedy? I can’t understand.

If you want to see more, check them all out at Jezebel

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